Seen around town

I keep telling myself that I’m going to bring the camera along when I run errands, but it just doesn’t seem to happen — my brain and a colander have a few things in common, for one thing, and relying upon a cane for unfamiliar or uneven ground doesn’t make it easy to just hop out of the car to take a photo — so you’ll just have to take my word for it that I’ve been seeing these signs as I drive down the road.

  • Meow spoken here (posted outside a compounding pharmacy)
  • Congratulations! You made it out of bed (signage in front of a drive-through coffee hut)
  • Depresso: that feeling when you run out of coffee  (different coffee place)
  • Vote for Pedro  (yet another coffee place — we have a lot of them, but that deserves its own blog post)
  •  Exercise? I thought you said Mexi-fries!  (taco place, obviously)

Today is the first day of our local weekly farmers’ market and I agreed to be a vendor again this year. I hope my ankle does not think this was a bad idea (set up, take-down, and 4 hours in the heat between those two events). Our resident teenager has one week of school remaining but must have all of his online coursework turned in by Sunday evening, so I suspect I will not be getting a chance to use the computer at my leisure.
Have a great weekend!

Can you see yourself? I can!

  • I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they’re flashing behind you.
  • Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
  • I’m great at multi-tasking–I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
  • If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
  • Doesn’t expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?
  • Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
  • Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
  • Ever stop to think and forget to start again?
  • When I married Mr. Right, I had no idea his first name was Always.
  • There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking.
  • Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.
  • Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type.
  • I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.
  • I like long walks, especially when they’re taken by people who annoy me.
  • Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded…

THOUGHTS from an email message

If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.

A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, but is still fat.
A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
A tortoise doesn’t run and does mostly nothing, yet it  lives for 150 years.
And you tell me to exercise?? I don’t think so.

Just grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to remember the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I’m older here’s what I’ve discovered:

  1.    I started out with nothing, and I still have most of  it.
  2.    My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.
  3.    I  finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.
  4.    Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
  5.    Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.
  6.    If all is not lost, then where the heck is it ?
  7.    It was a whole lot easier to get older, than to get wiser.
  8.    Some days, you’re the top dog, some days you’re the hydrant; the early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
  9.    I wish the buck really did stop here, I sure could use a few of them.
  10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.
  11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.
  12. It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
  13. The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.
  14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he’d have put them on my knees.
  15. When I’m finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.
  16. It’s not hard to meet expenses…. they’re everywhere.
  17. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter, I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I’m “here after”.
  18. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

Pondering

Ponderosa Pine

Ponderosa Pine

I had amnesia once — maybe twice.

 

I went to San Francisco .
I found someone’s heart. Now what?

 

Protons have mass?
I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

 

All I ask is a chance to prove that 
money can’t make me happy.

 

If the world were a logical place,
men would be the ones who
ride horses sidesaddle.

 

What is a “free” gift?
Aren’t all gifts free?

 

They told me I was gullible
and I believed them.

 

Teach a child to be polite and
courteous in the home and,
when he grows up, he’ll never be able
to merge his car onto the freeway.

 

Experience is the thing you have left
when everything else is gone.

 

One nice thing about egotists:
they don’t talk about other people.

 

I used to be indecisive.
Now I’m not sure.

 

How can there be self-help “groups”?

 

If swimming is so good for your figure, 
how do you explain whales?

 

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, 
and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants off.

 

Is it me — or
do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

_____________________________________________
Today’s Friday Funny is courtesy of my friend Carol, who sent these to me in an e-mail.

Unwritten stories of life and death

There are things about which I simply cannot write. Things like possums that curl up and die in a hidden corner of the garage/bonus room. It’s been nearly 9 years now since that incident and my boys know that just saying the word “possum” still gives me the heebie-jeebies.

There are other things about which I have written only in passing — upchucked chipmunk heads, for example — because I am thoroughly squeamish about such things. (I avoided both the cat and the front porch for many days after that incident.) When my husband was deployed, I relied on neighbors to rescue me from the horrors of decaying creatures and dead birds in the fish pond. When faced with a mouse in my suitcase, I locked myself and my baby in the bathroom (oblivious to the fact that there was a one-inch space between the floor and the bottom of the door).

Becky over at Noodleroux is much better about injecting humor into the situation. Go read this post and you’ll see why she’s my new hero.

A St. Patrick’s Day Prayer

DSCN1352

I got home from a meeting last night to find that KCINNOTX had been thinking of me. This card was in my mailbox. Thanks, BB! 🙂

No beer was turned green in the making of this card or the celebrating of this holiday by either of us.  We prefer our Guinness unadulterated. Please pass the corned beef and cabbage!

A beautiful poem about growing older

An older woman whom I am proud to know as a friend [waving hello to Carol 🙂 ] sent the following message to me in an e-mail, and I wanted to share it with my blogging friends.

 

I hope this poem has the same effect on you as it did me — then my forwarding it will be worth the effort.

 

 

WALK WITH ME AS I AGE

 

 

 

Walk with me by the water . . .

 

 

 

 

 

I forgot the words.

 

DSCN2302  Reflection

Unexpected Art

I work in a building that is nearly 100 years old. I’m usually bent over and jiggling my key in the office door, but occasionally I look up and appreciate this sight:

DSCN0412 Knox hall wall art, cat

Sometimes the best thing to do with an ugly hole and jutting wires is to bend the wires into whiskers.

Ready-made cat: just bend whiskers

Ready-made cat: just bend whiskers

Patience Crabstick’s recent post inspired this one.

Thank you, Hilary, for this award!

POTW-mauve